Bye Bye '08!

9 years after the millennium and I'm still waiting for the end of the world.
Many may say I'm a pessimist, but I'm just acknowledging what they once told me would happen. The big-bang, the white light.. the "we're all gonna die!"

Or maybe... it did happen! But not the way we expected... the world did actually go through a big change since '99.. not just Bush.. okay Bush had a big part in these nine years, bit I can't make this about him now..
Lemme go back in time nine years ago.. I got my dog Mickey... I was in the third grade... I had a yellow GameBoy... lol.. Fun times..
And each year I've grown... mentally! lol I think I'm the same height since..

2008 Recaps are fun too.
A looot of surprises...weddings... dances... secrets... pictures... laughs... stories... stuff that shouldn't have been done. But we can't regret those things now! Actually, those are the type of things that make this year a year to remember!!

This is the first new years eve where I'm not sad about what happened... just scared of what the new year will bring... Time does fly by...

In 10 minutes the new year will be here.
And it'll be gone in an instant.
So fuck Bush!! Fuck Obama! .. Ok, not Obama.. Fuck Leonel and Hipolito!
Fuck the end...
Be prepared for the begining!

Walking, Talking Selfcontradiction

I've spun so many times through my head to make a choice on what to write about next; at the end it always turns out to be a contradiction or a self-discovery, based on certain dates... like right now I was going to write of how I "already forgot" some dates and times I've always wanted to forget. Or just before that, I discovered I won't ever forget those datesand times. Or how about right now, I discovered I contradict myself "unconsciounsly"...

I just found out I write to try to forget, and read to remember...

I gotta stop lying to myself.

You wanted questions?

I can draw hearts and flowers. Can you?

What happened after I went to sleep that morning at 6am?

Why did we miss watching a group for each other?

How many pictures?

Was it too little time? Or too much time?

Who told me to take up piano again?

Where were you on the day of my birthday?

Will you write back?

I was surprised. Were you?

Did I break that particular organ keeping you alive?

Were you inspired enough?

Do you remember the night we stared at stars?

When can I apologize?


Have I ever told you orange suits you?

Reading back...

It's just funny how sometimes I go back in time just by reading old entries. I mean to go back and exactly remember how I felt that day and what made me write just means the world to me.
As I've said before, memories are the key things I have in life. Its my personal time machine.
I laugh, cry at entries and stuff, and I its just incredible.. at least for me. lol
Each mind is created differently and everyone's perspective is different. I just feel I respect everyone's opinions and thoughts, cuz without them I wouldn't think.

Blurry Moon

Where the sun sets at 9pm.
Where heat makes us lose our heads.
And where boredom comes to the point that people write in old math notebooks.
It might sound far away, but it's closer than you think... Distance doesn't matter when it comes to "home-sickness".

Eyes are on me 24/7, but aren't actually seeing.
I see;
but at the end, I see only what I wanna see;
imagine what I want to imagine.
Stuck on movie-like moments and never ending dreams.

Where the real life scares the living crap out of me,
and yet still means nothing to me.
Cuz all the flowers, all the ice cream,
all the colours don't scare me at all.
It's a place where nights are like cloudy oceans filled with
pirates seeking treasure every second Tuesday of the month.
Its where people really can say "it's a small world".
Nope. It ain't Disney!...

It's the corner of my undecided, jealous, lazy, confused mind...

And it struggled so much not to use the "T" word while writing...

Ima let the jungle run wild.

As rain falls

Bring in the red wine and champagne, the rain is helping the mood slide in. Breath in the fresh air of the cigarette’s smoke, and tell me how this all began.

Close your eyes and laugh at what you see. Imagine the many ways you want your heart to be broken. Dream of a dream where dreams aren’t dreams, and wake up to another day. See the light of the brightest star in the sky; wonder why it’s up there, how it got there, and will it be there tomorrow?

Lay on your floor, and look me in the eyes… kiss me, if you will; but stay in silence. Listen to the ground… to your heart and mind. Read my thoughts of how the future preoccupies me, but don’t leave out that something makes me stay in the present time, looking deep into your eyes also, mapping out what you’re thinking.

This all started in days of youth and curiosity; days of love and bravery; confusion and immaturity; selfishness and deceit; loss and misery; hope and pride; days of defeat and obviousness… to all restart to another day of youth and love.

Una hora de histora.

*tic toc tic toc...*

Una semana para el nacimiento de una pensadora del tiempo. Cada segundo de vida en desesperación; esperando pacientemente el paso de las horas. Sus días parecen siglos, pero sus minutos parecen instantes.

La semana de los 9 meses.
La hora de los 5 días.
El segundo de los 7 minutos.
Calculando cada *tic toc* del reloj.

Ella nace, luego muere. Su segundo de vida, en años... ¿dónde están?

Números es existencia. Suma y resta con la concecuencia de 0.

Ya llegamos a su funeral; a su hora 0.

¿Te acuerdas de ella?

Lo dudo. Ella no se despidió.

From the past.

I wrote this, it looks like, a long time ago, but I just found it. Here goes...

It's a relieved feeling... like I'm happy the past is past. Kinda like if I achieved something. Like my goal was to change, and I did. But that's just in the present moment I'm looking at the past. If I keep thinking, there I get moody. There I think of what I did wrong in the past, what things I would change, what things I miss. And here's where I notice the goal I haven't achieved; drop the past. I talk so much about it, think so much about it, but I just can't seem to let it be.

I guess that since there's no time-travel yet, my past is my sanctuary.

When will I finally pop out?

La juventud está perdida.

Full moon, cold breeze, silohuettes of pine trees and palm trees all around me. Nature; incredible... amazing beauty. Moments in life we use to think or just relax. Site-seeing in the mountains, waiting for the sunrise. Laying on the grass looking at the clouds. Sitting on the beach watching the sunset.

...And how we waste those moments...

We only dream about them, nowadays... we're too busy or too distracted. Too tired and too lazy. But we have the time to wish to see those moments.

Bullshit.

Take a drive out of town... one morning to feel the energy flow; or an afternoon to see the colours of the sky... no distractions... just you and ol' Mother Nature...

Quiet time simplifies life.

Blvd. of Broken Dreams

Is it possible to not know what's going through you own mind?...
When everything you think, you don't actually understand?...
Or is it that you don't want to accept what reality has in store for you?...
That the dream you've always held onto, is tearing apart...

Picture that dream.
That moment in life were you'll feel perfect.
Wouldn't it be horrible if that dream was just torn away?...

Despite all we do in life, we keep wanting that special something.
Or do we?...

Our heads are full up with life and problems... at least at one point of our lives we'll think that dream is just nonsense or stupidity.

So, where do our lives take us? To the light at the end of a tunnel?

We don't know the answer because we don't have the guts to ask. And we never will.

But what about those who have fulfilled their so-called dream?
They should be happy as pie...
And dead. They have nothing else to do here, so they might as well leave.
Maybe the do leave... but those who stay?
I think someone's faking their dreeeeeam...
What's been going through you mind?
I bet you don't understand.
No worries.

Neither do I.

the.day

The day is coming,
The day responsibilities are assumed,
The day decisions will have to come fast,
The day you notice life isn’t forever,
That day you'll know its too late to apologize.

A lil late but...

Happy 1 Year Blog!